Before marriage, many couples work hard to spend time together. After the wedding, especially when children arrive, that time is often the first thing to disappear. Yet friendship and joy are not extras in marriage. They are part of what keeps it strong.
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?" (Amos 3:3, KJV)
Walking together takes time. You cannot stay close to someone you rarely talk to, laugh with or enjoy.
Why dating your spouse matters
- It reminds you that you are friends, not only partners in running a household.
- It gives space for conversations that never happen in the rush of daily life.
- It shows your children that their parents love and enjoy each other.
Ideas that cost little or nothing
- Take a walk together after the children are asleep, or ask a family member to watch them for an hour.
- Cook a new recipe together and eat by candlelight at home.
- Visit a park, lake or market you have never explored.
- Read a short book together and discuss a chapter each week.
- Look through your wedding photos and share what you remember.
- Serve together for an afternoon, then share a meal afterwards.
Make the conversation count
A date is not only about the place. It is about attention. Put phones away and ask questions that go beyond schedules:
- What made you smile this week?
- What is something you are looking forward to?
- Is there a dream you have not told me about lately?
- How can I love you better this month?
When life is very full
Some seasons make regular dates hard: a new baby, illness, long working hours. In those seasons, aim for small moments: ten minutes of tea together, a shared prayer, a message in the middle of the day that simply says, "I am thankful for you."
"And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness." (Colossians 3:14, KJV)
A step for this week
Put a date in the calendar for the next two weeks. Take turns planning. Protect it as you would any important appointment.
Further reading
- Dating Your Spouse articles, Thriving Marriages
- 10 Fun Fall Date Ideas for Couples, FamilyLife
